Tuesday, June 26, 2012

An Email I Received….So Funny!

Hello Everyone! 

I received this email today and I just had to share it with all you.  It’s so funny!!   

Shopping With Your husband

After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to Target. Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to get in and get out.

Equally unfortunate, my wife is like most women - she loves to browse. Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local Target.

Dear Mrs. Samuel,

Over the past six months, your husband has caused quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate his behavior and have been forced to ban both of you from the store. Our complaints against your husband, Mr. Samuel, are listed below and are documented by our video surveillance cameras.

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in other people's carts when they weren't looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in House wares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. July 7: He made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's restroom.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in House wares. Get on it right away'. This caused the employee to leave her assigned station and receive a reprimand from her Supervisor that in turn resulted with a union grievance, causing management to lose time and costing the company money.

5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&Ms on layaway.

6. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. August 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told the children shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the bedding department to which twenty children obliged.

8. August 23: When a clerk asked if they could help him he began crying and screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?' EMTs were called.

9. September 4: Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he picked his nose.

10. September 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk where the antidepressants were.

11. October 3: Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the 'Mission Impossible' theme.

12. October 6: In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by using different sizes of funnels.

13. October 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled 'PICK ME! PICK ME!'

14. October 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'

And last, but not least:

15. October 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here.' One of the clerks passed out.

LOVE MAIL FROM ME TO YOU!! XOXO

Gail

14 comments:

  1. LOL! This is hilarious! I could see a guy doing this. Now I'm off the the bathroom!! :)
    Be a sweetie,
    Shelia ;)

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  2. Hahah, that should cause her to insist that he stays at home during all shopping expeditions.
    Thanks so much for your sweet comment today. Very encouraging to know that people care.
    Hugs, Cindy

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  3. hi Gail

    email me some of the pics you want in a header like mine and I'll get it made up and emailed back to you..

    you have so so I know you can get it on your blog..
    happy to do it.
    Sonny

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  4. TOO FUNNY! Don't forget to enter my giveaway.

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  5. Joe is not THAT bad but does insist Target is a CHICK store.

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  6. LOL -- that is too much! Only thing worse then Target with husband, Target with grown (or almost grown) sons :)

    Blessings!
    Gail

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  7. Oh that is just too funny!

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  8. LOL I never go shopping with my husband and this is why ;-)
    ((Hugs))
    Anne

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  9. Me too! I'd rather not go, he doesn't walk he almost runs thur the store gets what we came in for and leaves!
    I read this a while ago, to funny!

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  10. Thanks for sharing, Gail! That was Too Funny!

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  11. Totally hilarious. I am so cracking up. I think I am going to have to try a few of Mr. Samuel's little tricks next time we take our youth group on a shopping trip. Think they'd be embarrassed? Ohhhhh, yes, yes, yes, that would be sooooo much fun. Thanks for sharing.

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  12. Gail, your hubby and my hubby would get along perfectly! How funny this is! I just love it! My hubby always gripes when we go to Target. He knows his way around Wal-mart and then complains when things aren't where they should be at Target...saying this is where they would be if we were at Walmart! oh my...
    Anyhow...have a wonderful week.
    Blessings,
    Debbie

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